I Met My Younger Self for Coffee (actually, tea): The Power of Parts Work

I met with my 24-year-old self for tea today (we don’t like coffee).

She looked like she had it all together but she told me how she was full of anxiety and self-doubt.

Despite her accomplishments, she questioned if she deserved them and worried that others would find out that she was a fraud who had no idea what she was doing.

She was sleep-deprived, emotionally depleted, and on the edge of burnout.

She looked at me and asked “Will I always feel this way?”.

I told her about my life now.

How I graduated with my PhD, and opened my own practice after years of burnout.

I told her about going to therapy and digging deep to find the root cause of imposter syndrome and anxiety so that we could find our way out.

She asked me if I was still full of self-doubt, anxiety, and burnout.

I told her “No. Of course, there are times when anxiety and self-doubt pop up, but it doesn’t run my life.”

She took a deep breath and exhaled. She looked full of hope.

What is Parts Work in Therapy?

All of us have parts. We may have an inner critic, an overachiever part, an anxious part, or a part that yells at us when we keep saying yes to things when we need to say no. These parts are like different voices or perspectives within us—each with its own thoughts, feelings, and motivations. Sometimes, these parts work together seamlessly. Other times, they clash, leaving us feeling conflicted, overwhelmed, or stuck.

When my clients enter therapy, it’s usually because a part of them is having difficulty. Maybe a part of them is exhausted and craving rest, but another part insists they keep pushing through to meet impossible expectations. Or a part feels burnt out, while another struggles to delegate at work out of fear of being seen as incompetent. It’s also common for someone to feel proud of their accomplishments while simultaneously having a part that whispers, "You’re a fraud—don’t get too comfortable."

Parts work in therapy involves identifying these different internal voices, understanding what they’re trying to protect or achieve, and helping them work together instead of against each other. The goal isn’t to get rid of any parts—even the ones that seem “negative”—but to develop compassion and curiosity toward them. Often, those critical or anxious parts are just trying to keep us safe, even if their methods are outdated or unhelpful.

By getting to know these parts, you can start to unblend from them. Instead of being the anxious part or becoming the inner critic, you begin to notice those voices without letting them take over. This creates space for you to respond to situations from a calm, centered place rather than react out of fear, guilt, or pressure.

Parts work can be especially helpful for people struggling with burnout, imposter syndrome, and perfectionism—because let’s face it, those patterns often come from competing internal parts pulling you in different directions. One part says, "Slow down, you need rest," while another shouts, "You can’t let anyone down!" Therapy helps you listen to both, understand their concerns, and find a balanced way forward.

How Does Parts Work Help?

Parts work helps by creating awareness, understanding, and compassion for the different internal voices pulling you in various directions. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by conflicting emotions or stuck in self-sabotaging patterns, you learn to recognize that these internal struggles are different parts of you—each with its own purpose and perspective. This awareness alone can be incredibly freeing.

For example, let’s say a part of you feels burned out and wants to rest, but another part insists you power through because it fears disappointing others. Without awareness, you might just feel exhausted and frustrated, wondering why you can’t stop overcommitting. Parts work helps you pause and tune into both parts: the tired one and the one that fears letting people down. By listening to both, you can explore what each part needs. Maybe the burnout part needs boundaries and rest, while the people-pleasing part needs reassurance that setting limits doesn’t mean you’ll lose your relationships.

Here are some specific ways parts work helps:

1. Creates Internal Clarity:
When you recognize that your conflicting feelings are coming from different parts, things start to make sense. You’re no longer caught in confusion like, "Why do I feel proud and ashamed at the same time?" Instead, you realize that different parts of you hold those feelings, each based on past experiences and beliefs.

2. Reduces Self-Criticism:
It’s easy to beat yourself up for procrastinating, people-pleasing, or overworking. But when you understand why certain parts act the way they do, it’s easier to replace self-criticism with compassion. That inner critic? It might be trying to push you to succeed because, at some point, it learned that perfection was the way to stay safe or earn approval. Understanding this doesn’t excuse harmful patterns but helps you address them more gently and effectively.

3. Promotes Emotional Regulation:
When parts take over—like an anxious part spiraling about a meeting or an angry part reacting to criticism—you can feel hijacked by your emotions. Parts work helps you unblend from those parts, allowing you to respond rather than react. You might say to yourself, "I notice my anxious part is really loud right now," which creates space to soothe that part instead of being consumed by anxiety.

4. Helps Heal Old Wounds:
Many parts formed as protective responses to earlier experiences. Maybe your people-pleasing part emerged in childhood to keep the peace, or your perfectionist part developed to gain approval. Parts work allows you to connect with these protective parts and the vulnerable parts they’re guarding—often leading to deep healing. When those wounded parts receive compassion and acknowledgment, the protective parts can relax, reducing the intensity of reactions like guilt, fear, or shame.

 5. Fosters Better Decisions and Boundaries:
When you understand your internal conflicts, making decisions becomes clearer. Instead of battling with yourself—like debating whether to say no to a work request—you can listen to the parts involved and find a balanced solution. You might tell your overachiever part, "I appreciate how hard you work to keep me successful, but burning out isn’t sustainable. Let’s find another way to show up without sacrificing my well-being." This approach leads to healthier boundaries and choices aligned with your values.

 6. Cultivates Self-Leadership:
The ultimate goal of parts work is to strengthen what’s known as your Self—the calm, compassionate, and wise core of who you are. When you lead from this place, you can care for all your parts without letting any single one take over. It’s like becoming the conductor of your internal orchestra, helping each part play its role without dominating the entire symphony.

Final Thoughts

Therapy is a great place for you to explore your parts, how they have helped you, their role, and the burdens they might be carrying that they need to release.

Heal Burnout, Anxiety, and Imposter Syndrome with Therapy for High-Achieving Women in Austin and throughout the state of Texas!

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Want to be more productive without the relentless self-doubt and anxiety that keeps you stuck? You’re in the right place. I’m Dr. Molly Moore, a licensed psychologist in Austin, TX who specializes in working with high-achieving women who experience anxiety, imposter syndrome, and burnout. Not in Austin, no problem! All services are provided online. Reach out today to get started!